Fake Eaters vs. Heavy Eaters

Have you ever gone to a restaurant starving and the person you are with or next to orders a small salad for dinner? What about that guy next to you that orders two entrees? Starve or pork-out? Who is more annoying?

Fake Eaters

1. Are only faking themselves. And maybe not even that. Everybody needs to diet, but come on! How is it humanely possible to eat only a singe tortilla or five pieces of lettuce for dinner? Even starving people on food rations in Africa would say you are insane. I know those are your role models, but do you really need your ribs to pop out of your sides? Once we can see your eye sockets, you need to stop and go eat an extra large pizza or two hoagies. You know you are hungry. Is it really worth it to have boney elbows? When you start looking at the food thrown away in garbage cans, you really have a problem. Do you wonder why super skinny coc addicted models are so grumpy? Hello, lack of food. FYI, eat a burger.
2. Should be banned from restaurants. Unless they are actually going to take my advice and eat something and not run to the bathroom and make themselves throw it up immediately after eating it. if you are not going to eat the food, then don't waste the table space and most importantly, the chef's work. What a shame to waste that good food. There is good reason why Spain and England banned models that were too skinny. Don't waste good food.

Heavy Eaters

1. Should be banned from restaurants. Although they should be commended for appreciating and not wasting good food, that does not include all food in existence. Leave some for the rest of us! You will make the rest of us turn into boney twiggy starving models desperately in need of an extra large pizza with the works. God forbid they walk into a all-you-can-eat buffet! The cooks will run away in fear. But maybe that's a good thing since the food usually is terrible anyways. 
2. Should be used to ward off the fake eaters. Every restaurant should have a few of these guys out front, not inside eating all the food, to act like bouncers. Anorexic and bulimic super models and wannabe hipsters will be so repulsed that people are outside voraciously eating large portions of food and not just drinking a cocktail and splitting an appetizer, that they will run away in pure fear that they might be pressured to eat a real meal. OMG! What do you mean that we can't go to a restaurant and waste a table by just hanging out and not ordering anything? You mean this restaurant has to make money to pay the lease? But, I eat the free nacho chips for dinner. Doesn't that count? 

Is one worse than the other? Does it matter?